Autism

Today is the 14th anniversary of my kidney transplant.

Let’s hope today is better than yesterday.

It’s hot and raining here. So I guess we have a monsoon season now. Climate change is just great…

Our power went out at 2:00AM this morning due to storms. Power is out across the city. I am typing this by lantern. I don’t know if I can go to work today as of right now I cannot make coffee.

I was not raised in a socially and emotionally healthy family, but I have to imagine that there is always some social tension in a child’s life, even if they have a friend group, right?

There are noises in my house and I don’t know what is causing them, yet.

Hi, I’m feeling upset, and I’m not sure who to contact that I can talk to. I’m in a bad situation where I was involved with a summer play with an autism group where I found out today I had been removed from the play itself, not the group, over a disagreement over a single line. This is a play where they allow you to choose what character you want to be, and I ended up choosing one of the Disney Gummi Bears over something that was suggested to me a month ago.

If you know, you know. I just don’t know myself.

I watch late night shows in the morning. Started doing this years ago. One of those shows was Colbert. Now he’s off the air and that sucks.

Got woken in the middle of the night and had to go down to the basement because there was a tornado warning in the area.

I have been struggling with this because a lot of people around me use it in this manner when they do something dumb or they act in an awkward way and they’ll be like “oh, that was autistic of me” or “I’ve got the tism” and I always feel so uncomfortable but I also don’t know how to raise it or what to say. I am myself not diagnosed, but I’m pretty sure I am on the spectrum. I was just wondering what you think of it and how you handle it.

I should have stayed in bed.

I have a “suspected diagnosis” (German: Verdachtsdiagnose) of ASD by a psychiatrist, and they forwarded me to a clinic that can perform the full diagnosis. I’ve filled out a form and been put on the waitlist, but they couldn’t give an estimate. Another clinic in my region also does autism diagnoses for adults, but their website says they have waiting times of 2–3 years 😵‍💫

I had been working really hard to plan my medical leave but whoops I couldn’t stop crying last night so I decided I probably shouldn’t go to work today so I guess it’s starting early.

One of my children is heavily autistic and nonverbal at 6. He had constipation issues before which made him fearful of going #2. He trained himself to just never have a bowel movement, so he soils his diapers all day (his bowls are full and it’s the natural progression out). It concerns me because he’s continuously backed up and that’s not good for his long term health.

I experience something similar to an impulse buy, where I see a product on the shelf and immediately want it, except usually I don’t actually buy it and then walk out of the store without it and forget I ever wanted it. Anyone else do that?

Yesterday was an off day. Everything I needed to do was derailed by things I considered less important but have no say in. I hope today is better.

So, sad stuff, my mom died when I was 23, and my dad just passed this week, as I’m just shy of 40. Early and sucks but is what it is.

The holiday is over. Now we go do the things that make the money, so we can feed the cats.

Yep definitely needed that coffee.

May need coffee.

I’m looking for some good socks for around the house. I work at home and the weather here is not super cold, but not exactly warm most of the year, so I spend a lot of time in them.

So no demolition this weekend.

I didn’t realize we have a three day weekend this week. So yay! Going to try to do some demolition.

Orion Kelly is exploring the idea of creating an autistic & neurodivergent convention.

It’s already been a long week. But I’m off call now.

At the ER with my wife. This is not an unusual event for either of us unfortunately. The good news is we have American healthcare so we get to pay to wait in our long line. And I have been up all night. yay.

You would believe the things I’ve seen! They’re quite ordinary things really.

I am on call.

So obviously from time to time you have to call some service (especially in australia where so many digital systems seem to break often, so you have to call customer service)

Cats didn’t let me sleep last night. Assholes.

I hope you have a good day.

I just unloaded then loaded and started the dishwasher. Don’t tell me I can’t do the possible!

The birds are singing. Like a lot of birds out there this morning.

Basically I was told that I parentify everyone I meet, I got kicked out because of that. I just feel horrible. Ive been sobbing. I also have BPD most likely but I was in therpy, they kept telling me they didnt think I was gonna get better, and how I dont want to get better.

You may have heard the news. As for me I’m trying to not hear the news.

I was typing this up but then I started watching TV. But here it is!

Let me preface this by saying, I am extremely fortunate to be working a fully remote job where I am able to manage my environment and generally be as I am without too much trouble from that.

“We just didn’t know what to do with you.” My mother talking about my childhood. They were not equipped to handle a “gifted” child.

Every article I read about the common social struggles of autism, talks about the need to build a supportive and inclusive environment.

I’m sorry, but I make no apologies!